Dec 13, 2010

Mothers (a reply)

Merhaba my dear Friends,

Here I am again jumping to another topic and never following one direction but I am sure like me MiMi’cim post touched your heart and you will forgive me if I postpone my topic about Love in AIM to another time, in fact talking about mothers is also talking about love. MiMi’cim I am happy to read and learn from your post how much we are standing at the same window about a lot of things related to this movie.
In the big house 4 persons grew up without having their biological mother around. Behlul, Besir, Nihal and Bulent. It’s interesting to see how each of them was dealing with this missing in a different way.

Bulent the little boy … always looking for a nice gesture from anybody at home. He is willing to receive any attention from any of the habitant of the big house, he always takes it as a gesture of love. In the episode when we saw him getting his own room, we could learn how the happy and easygoing little boy was in fact carrying his own wounds. His needs to say the word  annem was a heartbreaking moment. So many things happened at that instant.
His enthusiasm for his new room hurts his sister’s feeling. Nihal discovered that she was wrong thinking she was successful in playing the role of the mom for him.
Instead Samar Hanem won the title of mom just for preparing a room for him. The perception of the two kids of Samar’s gesture is interesting to look at with more attention. He simply took it as a gesture of attention and love from her because he is eager of any gesture of love. Looking for a mom substitute, he didn’t pay attention to his sister’s feeling, nor to the fact that the woman who was the only mom he had was subtly pushed away. Well the boy is too young and too much things were suddenly rounding him. I was sorry for him for being the only kid in this complex world of adults.

Nihal instead was very much hurts.  her case is kind of complex. Part of her reaction is like you said, by playing the mom to others. She knows how is it to grow up missing a mom and she wants to protect everybody around her from the pain of this missing…. I will add Behlul to your list of her adopted kids.

Behlul, refuses any real attachment. I think he is the reason why they all failed to be the mother substitute for him. I guess he refused to open up to another possible mother and felt his role was more to comfort the kids after they lost their own mom. It was a kind of self punishment. I see a lot of self destruction in Behlul’s character but it’s too early to talk about this aspect yet. May be I am wrong about him.

Besir, well for me a little bit scary character. He thinks life owes him something and this something is Nihal.

Quote my MiMi:
My Wise lady loved reading your vision about Behlul and how losing his mother caused major diverts on his life BUT I never pictured him with Adnan's wife, always thought of him arriving to the big house after the mother of the kids passed away..

Well MiMi’cim, for me from the moment I knew Behlul’s story,  I wanted to know if he was there before or after Nihal’s mom passed away and I didn’t stop asking myself about it until I got the answer in one of the episodes. It was after the big fight he had with Nihal. Yes Nihal’s mom hugged him and wiped his tears when he arrived at the big house. For  some time she was a mother substitute for him.

Muchos Besos,


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